Salvia Revisited

[Sphinx]

Well it has been a about a year since my last swim with salvia.

In the past my first experience's were preceded by allot of apprehension. I have prior experience with other Entheogens and really grove on the visual aspects and the amazing inner transformations/realizations. Its like OK, I see whats going on and that awarness always blows me away and I come home feeling mellow and good. That's most of the time.

Salvia was different, I've been there a good 10? times in the past and every time It would be a very strong mental/emotional/physical experience but not very visual. That was always a bit of a let down for me and the very sudden ripping away of my memory/self was also frightening at first. I would float around this strange pulsating vine like environment ( eyes closed ) and observe my notion of myself and all the memories of who and what I was just vanish into the pulsating vine like orb. As I would come back to myself It was a relief and I even enjoyed the heightened sense of visual perception ( it was no shroom trip but still cool) and the part I liked the best was the returning to me.

OK so after about 10 goes at it I got rather tired of the same experience over and over again so I figured whats the point. I never really liked extinguishing myself, and after several tries I even learned to relax into it and not fight the experience, but it just never sat well with me.

Well this time it was different, I had no apprehensions at all and new what to expect going in....bye bye self, hello orb. But this time when I went under I had a new realization about myself as I went down. Its like for the first time I could... feel... that the pulsating orb was good. In the past it was really a place of dread and although I went in preparing myself not to fear it ( it does end) but this time I just truly rested in it. It was actually good to be there. I realized that in the past I would get a strong guilt reaction, its not good to be snuffing out yourself type response but this time It didn't hit me at that gut level.

So I don't know, did it again and same good experience. I also realized that it helps with depression and boredom. I have been struggling a little with this and I think it helped me to put my life in perspective.

Anyway, I guess my point is a break from it seemed to do me good. Same experience, but alot more meaning full this time.

[salvialover24]

Originally Posted by Sphinx

Well it has been a about a year since my last swim with salvia.

In the past my first experience's were preceded by allot of apprehension. I have prior experience with other Entheogens and really grove on the visual aspects and the amazing inner transformations/realizations. Its like OK, I see whats going on and that awarness always blows me away and I come home feeling mellow and good. That's most of the time.

Salvia was different, I've been there a good 10? times in the past and every time It would be a very strong mental/emotional/physical experience but not very visual. That was always a bit of a let down for me and the very sudden ripping away of my memory/self was also frightening at first. I would float around this strange pulsating vine like environment ( eyes closed ) and observe my notion of myself and all the memories of who and what I was just vanish into the pulsating vine like orb. As I would come back to myself It was a relief and I even enjoyed the heightened sense of visual perception ( it was no shroom trip but still cool) and the part I liked the best was the returning to me.

OK so after about 10 goes at it I got rather tired of the same experience over and over again so I figured whats the point. I never really liked extinguishing myself, and after several tries I even learned to relax into it and not fight the experience, but it just never sat well with me.

Well this time it was different, I had no apprehensions at all and new what to expect going in....bye bye self, hello orb. But this time when I went under I had a new realization about myself as I went down. Its like for the first time I could... feel... that the pulsating orb was good. In the past it was really a place of dread and although I went in preparing myself not to fear it ( it does end) but this time I just truly rested in it. It was actually good to be there. I realized that in the past I would get a strong guilt reaction, its not good to be snuffing out yourself type response but this time It didn't hit me at that gut level.

So I don't know, did it again and same good experience. I also realized that it helps with depression and boredom. I have been struggling a little with this and I think it helped me to put my life in perspective.

Anyway, I guess my point is a break from it seemed to do me good. Same experience, but alot more meaning full this time.

Very nice. It helps me also for depression. Sometimes a bit too much, because I think that the depressive state can have its reason. And that is why I do think that break are important. Some terrestrial problem have to be solved on earth. The solution from heaven is of a different nature.
That is why, also, I try to distinguish medicinal use of salvia and spiritual use. The calling is of a different nature. The nature of the experience also.

Once I smoked salvia, and the feeling was like someone told me to smoke pot instead, and to take some recreation. I needed to do that. I realized I was in need of "staying in the forgetting state", if only to better appreciate the terrestrial aspect of life. A very curious feeling. Usually I have such feeling when I do too much math. I am amazed to have such a feeling with an entheogen. It really regulates itself.

Going too often "there" makes no sense. Eventually you learn that you are really always there, but it is better to forget that to be able to accomplish all what you have to do here. Break imposes themselves. The "calling" get more rare, but the experience get more smooth and pleasant. But with salvia, it is never a recreative experience. It is always a teaching of some sort. It is very weird.

[Sphinx]

Yes I am seeing the teacher aspects of plants. It is a subtle movement but you know when its too much and when its calling. I actually like the realization now that there is a terrestrial dimension to me, its there in the pulsating orb. I have also been deep into other entheogens but its not like salvia realy. Their deep places are amazing for me, its more like floating in space with soothing reverberations, colours whirling, and I'm plugged into the cosmos. This leaves me a glimmer of my essence.

With salvia my essence is gone and that deep disconnected/amnesia feeling can be very frightening/disorintating, its no party thing! Also I was just a little let down the first few rounds, I wanted like so many people report to become paint on a wall, or become other poeple, etc... but its just not the effect it gives me. Only anxiety, or so it was.

I'm feel more relaxed about everything in general and its good. It is a very positive Salvia effect for me. I may just tool around every now and again with low doses just for the calming effect it seems to have.